The Wilder Gifts of the Spirit

The group is off consulting one another about the future of young adults at Woodbrooke, and I am hanging out in the Garden Lounge. I don't really have anything to say. A Saturday alone in a pretty place with a load of food and some random Norwegian music is probably what I need. Woodbrooke is infamous for piling on the pounds. You could easily have three full meals and not do anything to compensate. In the garden there is a labyrinth, the pond with the little boat, and the wooded area. It does look like a little piece of paradise. I should have spent more time just sitting here tapping away at a lap top. The course sessions were good, but I wasn't really in the right place to listen to ideas and theories about the early friends, and where Quakerism is going now. At least I had some perspective on where I am going with all this spiritual journey business. I don't think I set out to find God, I just needed a place where questioning was acceptable. I thought the day b...

I am back north. Here for the funeral and here for YALP. I suppose in theory I am supposed to finish this blog I started last year, but I am emotionally wriped out. I have been taking part in sessions as much as possible. I have been learning things about Quakerism which had left me confused before. I learnt about why we don’t always talk about our spiritual experiences in meeting, and we thought about ways in which that could possibly change. I certainly don’t think any of my spiritual experiences could be pointing towards a fixed truth. I don’t know what they mean, I have no idea f they point towards there being a God. I don’t even know what they mean for me entirely. It can help to share it sometimes. Quakerism is more about the form, rather than the content, and though it can be liberating to fill in your own blanks, it can be lonely and perhaps newcomers can get lost. 

So the weekend after next is the last residential. I am happy about it in a strange sad kind of way. I like writing about journeys, so I look forward to reflecting on how I have grown since last summer. A lot has changed, I had my heart broken, I left London, and I think you know, if you have read my blogs, how the story goes. Stories. I still haven't started my project. Last night I was at the last YALP online catch up and we talked about the difficulty of the phrase 'spirit lead'. I think I was taking it too literally in the sense that I was waiting from a sign from the spirit (or whatever you want to call the highest good in atheistic terms or otherwise). Perhaps that is too much to expect that the spirit would confirm to a time frame of one year. I didn't feel moved by the spirit, even when I decided to start getting involved in sustainability. So that is a point to debate in our residential discussions.