The Wilder Gifts of the Spirit

A week on from our wild trip to the north, and things are progressing along. I finally finished my book on Highly Sensitive People, and now I have space for the new spiritual reading I picked up last weekend. The book is called, 'F**k it,' and probably could be both light hearted and good for me. I thought whilst away that it would be good to go back to my morning pages. I managed to complete one set Monday morning. At least I tried. I had some inspiration perhaps a leading towards what my course project might end up being. I am not going to be too hopeful. Anything could happen. 

I don't think I will be going back to visit Wales this year. Not sure the broken pieces of my smashed up heart could take it, but one day, I will go back there. It will hurt like hell, but I know I should go. 

So, other than my rather trying somehow to heal from my forever broken heart, other things happened in the north, of a Quaker nature. We talked about our 'projects' we are meant to be working towards. This spirit lead project is not meant to be like a dissertation or anything connected to how we have been conditioned by our education or work, hence few of us have grasped how to go about doing one. It was cathartic to admit having done absolutely nothing, and to not be alone in that. But it was ok, and that is the liberating aspect of Quakerism. My project could start at the end of the Young Adult Leadership Course, and it would be fine. Totally fine. There is no deadline. I might have had a break through today with the idea of writing a spiritual journal. That is about it. Apart from the project we did workshops on conflict, and how to preform a meeting for clearness. I found both really helpful, and I think I will probably go back to the process for a meeting for clea...

I have more to report about my weekend away in Quakerland, apparently also starting to heal from crippling heart break. I came to the resolution that I hadn’t deserved the insensitivity that I was shown last summer. I don’t think anyone does. And I am not going to let how that person broke my heart ruin Wales, a country I am fond of, just because they also have a connection to the place. At least I will try. I guess it takes time to heal a broken heart, but it is good I decided I deserved better.

O And I would do anything for love I'd run right into hell and back I would do anything for love I'll never lie (again) to you and that's a fact But I'll never forget the way you feel right now - Oh no - - No way - And I would do anything for love But I won't do that , No I won't do- Anything for love Oh I would do anything for love I would do anything for love But I won't do that No I won't do that And some days it don't come easy And some days it don't come hard Some days it don't come at all And these are the days that never end And some nights you're breathing fire And some nights you're carved in ice Some nights you're like nothing I've ever Seen before, or will again And maybe I'm crazy Oh it's crazy and it's true I know you can save me No one else can save me now but you As long as the planets are turning As long as the stars are burning As long as your dreams a...

‘And like a sinner before the gates of heaven, I come crawling on back to you.’ 

There's a fire starting in my heart Reaching a fever pitch and it's bring me out the dark Finally, I can see you crystal clear Go ahead and sell me out and I'll lay your ship bare See how I'll leave with every piece of you Don't underestimate the things that I will do There's a fire starting in my heart Reaching a fever pitch and it's bring me out the dark The scars of your love remind me of us They keep me thinking that we almost had it all The scars of your love, they leave me breathless I can't help feeling We could have had it all (You're gonna wish you never had met me) Rolling in the deep (Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep) You had my heart inside of your hands (You're gonna wish you never had met me) And you played it to the beat (Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep) Baby, I have no story to be told But I've heard one on you and I'm gonna make your head burn Think of me in the depths of your despair Make a hom...